The Common Denominators – Forgiveness

by Jerie Parks

The dictionary defines forgiveness as:  giving up resentment against or the desire to punish, to pardon an offense or offender, to cancel a debt.

One of the things I have really noticed most during the Creative Community Calls with Christi are the common denominators that continue to plague us all at various times in one form or another.

The plagues I’m referring to are, in no particular order:  fear, insecurity, judgement, depression, pressure and forgiveness, among others. 

These may manifest themselves differently for each of us, but are nonetheless significant.

But for today, I will focus on forgiveness.

I’ve personally experienced all of the above afflictions at one time or another. However, I am now (thanks to The Creative Way) able to recognize when I’m experiencing one of them and determine what the circumstances are surrounding it and how I can change the direction of my thoughts to something more positive or productive. Also known as “adjusting my thermostat” or “changing my perception”.

Moving In a Straight Line

straight lineIn the 2nd week of The Creative Way, Christi specifically tasks us to learn about line.

“Line gives definition and direction to our lives.”

We tend to think about our lives very linearly.  When it comes to choosing the points in our lives and how we connect them, we have many choices for the types of lines and their direction.

However, we often relinquish the decision-making process to “letting it happen” or following old, familiar paths.  What we end up with is a “tangled line that may have little emphasis or direction”.

A Clear Vision Provides Clear Direction for Life

visionWe learn that direction is vision.

Vision is a tool to help guide us in a direction of making decisions every day toward our goal.

But we often make decisions based on our perception of a situation. Our perception is not always the most obvious or immediate answer.

Stepping back and gaining some objectivity from a situation very often helps clarify our perception of it.

We must constantly check whether our perception is moving us in the direction of our dream/vision.

If not, the remedy of a certain perspective (especially a negative one) is… forgiveness.

Forgiveness – Easier Said Than Done

Locked heartIf you are like me, forgiveness does not always come easy.

I am forever a work in progress on this topic.

However, our most recent coaching call with Christi taught us that changing perspective doesn’t mean you have to understand the person or behavior you are forgiving.

It simply means you are opening up the capacity to love or forgive in your own life.

Forgiveness expands our capacity to change perspectives.

But how can we give up one perception for another?

heart lightOne option is to take a look at repeat patterns/beliefs throughout our family and social groups.  Perceptions are often learned or conclusions we have jumped to. Again, we learn to step back and assess whether or not our perception is clear.

Remember…Forgiveness is not about the person you’re forgiving, it is about you.

“Go confidently in the direction of our dreams” – Thoreau

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